So What's So Bad about Being So-So?

I think the point of Lisa writing this story is to let people know that it’s ok to be so-so or even imperfect because no one’s perfect. We probably wish we all were, but that’ll never happen. I agree with her viewpoint because I’ve been there and I know that life isn‘t perfect because we are all just so-so in our own right. We have hobbies and opportunities in life that we should approach in some way, shape or form to see where it lands us. Whether its something you want to do the rest of your life or is something you just want to try out at the moment, you should go for it and never sell yourself short even if you’re not great and is only so-so. If you’re happy then that’s all that should matter, and being So-So, isn't So bad after all. There are many things that I’m good at and others, I’m just so-so. If you're so-so at something, good. If' you're good at something, great. The following story will explain a little bit about my So-So being.

Once upon a time, there was a young girl named Jackie who wanted to be an artist and a teacher when she grew up. She used to sit around and draw, and play school with her two younger brothers all of the time. This was fun to her and it’s what she wanted to do most of all. She even made a doll house out of cardboard boxes. As she got older, the idea of wanting this faded away. She started listening to music and dancing to the point of getting her brothers together and forming a group. One day while dancing to the group Parliament’s “Flash Light”, her mother and stepfather came home to witness the performance. Her mom immediately went over board with calls to radio and TV stations and who ever else she could get in touch with to see if Jackie and her brother’s could perform somewhere. Jackie didn’t think that her and her brother’s were good enough for that. It wasn’t something that she wanted to take outside of the house, but Jackie’s mom saw dollar signs, potential talent in the three siblings, and did what she felt she had to do to get them known. She wanted them to become famous like “The Jackson’s.”

From that point on the siblings were made into little stars. Jackie’s mom called them “Pookie and the Puppets.” Jackie’s youngest brother’s nick name was Pookie and he was made the star of the group and was put in front and center. Although Jackie didn’t like that very much because she was the one who formed the group and wanted to be the star, it was ok because Pookie was her little brother and he was the baby. The group went on to perform at their elementary school’s talent show’s (which afterwards the girls were all over Pookie at recess), concerts in the park, family picnics, and so on. They even got a chance to meet Randy and LaToya Jackson in Oakland on top of a roof building and got an autographed 8x10 photo signed by Michael Jackson. These were good times for Jackie and her brothers, but as time went on they got older and the brothers were no longer into it. Jackie’s mom tried pushing them to do it but they wanted to do something else so Jackie went on to do things on her own and took up playing the keyboard and writing songs which she was pretty good at. One day she went to her other brother Rob and asked him if he wanted to form another group which he agreed and he started playing the drums. Again Jackie’s mom saw this, stepped in, and through one of her friends, found a girl named Suzy. Suzy was added to the group and they were called Swinng.

They went into the Felstar studio (owned by Felton Pilate of Confunction) and recorded two songs, one of which was written in 1981 by Jackie called “Ice Ice Baby.” YES, “Ice Ice Baby” was written by Jackie in 1981. Swinng performed this song and others at the Solano County Fair in Vallejo and at the Holiday Inn in Emeryville. They were even featured in an Oakland magazine at the time. The group was together for a while before Suzy decided to go her own way, and then Jackie’s brother Rob left as well. Jackie stuck it out and found two other girls to form a group called “Total Pleasure.” She moved to Cincinnati to be with her group. They were in and out of the studio recording music, meeting different people, and trying to get their names out there. Jackie didn’t always feel like she was good enough and didn’t have the power in her voice like the other girls did. To Jackie she was just ok, so-so. She loved singing but knew she wouldn’t get far because there was so much more other talent out there that was better. Eventually the group wasn’t working out so Jackie stepped out and moved back to California and started a family. This is where she found her passion in cooking. Being a stay home mom and having to care for her family was important and making sure they were fed the best meals were a big deal. Cooking was fun, entertaining and relaxing. Jackie knew she had found the one thing that she was really great at and wanted to do it for others and not just her family. Today Jackie attends the Art Institute to become a great chef and hope to own her own restaurant one day.

I guess going back to my story, I did things growing up because it was something I really wanted but then once my mother stepped in, it didn’t seem to matter as much because she was more into it than I was. I feel like I was ok with what I was doing but it wasn’t good enough for me. I didn’t want to go out into the world and not be good enough. Plus being out there in the lime light like that, would’ve taken me away form my family and friends, something I couldn’t live without. I love to sing and my singing is for me only. I knew I could sing back then and I still can, but I’m no Beyonce or Alicia Keys. I knew I could write and still do occasionally, but I’m no poet. I know I can dance, and always have, but I’m no MJ (R.I.P), Usher or Ne-Yo. I enjoy what I enjoy and if it’s good enough for me, then I‘m happy.

My mother thinks to this day that I would’ve been as big as Michael Jackson….Ha….yeah right LOL, and yes, all I can do is laugh at her because she has no clue. I love my mom and appreciate the effort she put into trying to make something out of my brothers and me. It was just something I didn’t want anymore and haven’t wanted for years. She still tries to get me to so it today. I’m very content with the way things are going in my life right now. I still love to sing, dance and write songs; I may be so-so at it and that’s ok with me. I wasn’t trying to make a big deal out of it, or even make a living at it, it was just something to do at that time. I just want to have fun doing what I enjoy the most, and that’s cooking for others and making them happy in the process. Something that I’m more than so-so at doing.

Stuff Is Not Salvation - Journal 3

    Anna Quindlen's purpose in writing "Stuff is Not Salvation" is to make others aware of how the world can go bankrupt in such a short amount of time. She is trying to let people know that they don't always have to have a lot of material things such as "stuff". We can all go out and buy what we want if we have the means and the money to do so but do we really need it or is it just a want.

    I used to spend money a lot on music CD's and movies all of the time. I would go shopping every time I got my paycheck. It made me feel good to go shopping especially when I was stressed or upset about something, but when I got home with all of my shopping bags, I had to stop and think about what I had purchased. I would ask myself was it something I really needed, did I have to have it, and what am I going to do with it now that I have no money left. I would sometimes feel really bad after buying the "stuff " and would take it back to the store because the majority of the time I didn't need it.


    My soon to be ex came into some money after a car accident a few years ago. He spent the money like without thinking first. During that time, we went on the best vacations, my kids had clothes for days, I had flowers and chocolates sent to my job, had upgrades to our wedding rings, etc. After a few months I was tired of spending money. The money went so fast that we had to stop and take a look back at what had happened. There are the memories and the nice things we had to show for it.

     One of my best friends, I'll call Bell used to spend money on everything like it was going out of style. She would shop and buy stuff for my kids and me and all of this was going on her credit cards. She even took me to Hawaii for my birthday one year after she got her taxes. My kids and I always had a good time because she always treated us to concerts, limo rides around town during Christmas to see all of the lights lite up, and just about every birthday and holiday. She even gave an ex-coworker $1000 to help pay for his honeymoon. I always thought she had a problem with spending and mentioned it to her a few times, but she would always say "why stress over saving your money, because you can't take it with you when you die?" She thought it was good to go out and have a good time if she was having that good time with the people she loved and cared about. Today Bell is my roommate and she is struggling very much to make ends meat. She always complains about being broke and never having any money to go out and do anything with. She would sometimes admit that when she had money she knew she shouldn't be spending, she would spend it any way because she wanted to and that it made her and who ever she was spending the money on happy.

    Today I look at life in a different light. I don't have much money, it fact I have no money. I am on unemployment, trying to go to school so I can better myself and be successful and have money to make life a little easier. I realize that having a lot of money only makes you feel good for a little while. What makes me happy the most is spending time with my family and friends, loving life, learning to live in the moment, and laughing a lot and not sweating the small stuff. Money will always be here but it will not always make you happy. I have a friend who always tell me; if you don't need it then why buy it, because all it is, is a nice have but not a must have.

Blog/Journal #2 - Amy Tan's story "Fish Cheeks"

    
    I thought Amy Tan's story was great because it pointed out a lot of her issues with being different and trying to fit in. I believe her purpose in writing "Fish Cheeks" was to demonstrate the her family's culture on what she grew up on and the other ways that some people would see it and feel out of touch with her way of living. When she looked back on the experience she realized that her mother was right about being proud of who she was and where she came from. Her family was accustomed to living a certain way and not all families live that way.
    Amy had a crush on Robert and wanted to liked by him, but when Robert and his family came over for Christmas dinner and saw what was being served for dinner, the way it was being serve, and the way Amy's family was acting during and after dinner, she felt that Robert wouldn't like her. Amy realized I kind of know how she felt although my experience was a little different.
    There was a few times where I was ashamed and embarrassed to be around my bosses and co-workers. I knew what kind of person I was and I loved my job, therefore, I tried to stand out by pleasing everyone. I used to go to company picnics, company functions, Christmas dinners, parties and anniversaries. I would always take my soon to be ex-husband with me and each time I did, he would do or say something to embarrass me. I felt so out of place and ashamed. My husband has a PTSD and sometimes it makes him act a certain way and when people see it, they think that he's on drugs. That would sometimes embarrass me. I'll never forget the time we were at a company picnic and he started jumping on top of one of the picnic tables trying to be funny and trying to make everyone laugh, but it wasn't funny to me. I could never enjoy myself when he were there with me or even in public. When he would show up at my job I went outside to talk to him because I didn't know what he was going to do or say if he came into the office. My boss' and co-workers would give me a certain look that wasn't good. I thought I would lose my job on a few occasions because of him, but lucky for me I had really nice boss'. I also felt like they were looking at me thinking to themselves or telling others that they don't know why I'm with this person.
    I new I had to do something in the end, although my husband does have a condition, I've always tried being there for him. I just knew that I couldn't take him with me to anymore company functions because I didn't want to feel ashamed or be embarrassed by him. That might sound a little mean but it was really hard for me to be out with him around other people. In conclusion, I do realize today that you can't help how people are or how they act, you just have to be there for them and support them the best way you can, especially if you choose to be with that person for better or worse.

My Bio (edited)!

    Hello class, this is Jackie and here is a brief bio of myself. I am the proud mother of three beautiful children; 25, 19 and almost 18. I enjoy cooking and entertaining for my family and friends, which is why I chose to attend the Art Institute and earn my Bachelor's Degree in Culinary Management. I would like to own my own business one day and have something to leave behind for my kids.

    I am a positive person and very energetic. I love being around positive things and positive people. Positive energy is the key to my happiness. I am very caring, outgoing, friendly and loyal to all of my family and friends. Everyone who knows me loves me and my cooking! :) I love to hang out with my best friends; I enjoy dancing, and having a good time with no stress or drama. One of the most important things that I love is laughing. I feel that when you laugh; you're happy and it keeps you young (my kids actually keep me young). At this point and time in my life I am the happiest I've ever been and is very excited about school. I have a lot of dreams, ideas and goals in life and one of them is graduating with my Bachelor's Degree.

    I look forward to getting to know all of you this quarter and working together at becoming very successful in life. Let's go out into the world and make it happen!!